Category Archives: Explanations and definitions

  1. The grownup test: Clear, frank communication and negotiation


    March 29, 2013 by aggiesez

    I flunked telepathy. In relationships, I function extremely well with information — and quite poorly without it. Perhaps the most …
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  2. Couple privilege: Having it doesn’t necessarily make you an asshole (but it might)


    February 5, 2013 by aggiesez

    It’s surprisingly hard to talk about any kind of privilege — and that’s no accident. Privilege lives in the background. …
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  3. Couple privilege: Your thoughts?


    December 3, 2012 by aggiesez

    No matter how egalitarian you are, privilege exists. We’re all soaking in it — even in the polyamorous/open relationship community. …
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  4. Why I say “non-primary,” not “secondary”


    November 30, 2012 by aggiesez

    I’m a writer and editor by profession, so I choose words carefully. In this blog I deliberately refer to “non-primary” …
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  5. Riding the relationship escalator (or not)


    November 29, 2012 by aggiesez

    UPDATE FEBRUARY 2017: I’ve just published a new book based on this unexpectedly popular post. Stepping Off the Relationship Escalator: …
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  6. What’s a metamour? On my terms


    September 29, 2012 by aggiesez

    “Metamour” is an especially weird bit of poly-speak. But still, I think it’s a surprisingly useful and important term…

  7. Solo v. single: On my terms


    September 26, 2012 by aggiesez

    At this point I’m both “solo” and “single” — but mostly solo. What the hell does that mean?…

  8. What’s a primary partner? On my terms


    September 20, 2012 by aggiesez

    Polyamory definitely has a language problem. So I’ll start defining how I’m using certain terms in this blog… One of …
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  9. Single AND polyamorous? Why yes!


    August 20, 2012 by aggiesez

    My current relationship status (or lack thereof) baffles some people. How can I be poly when I’m not seeing anyone? …
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